Anniversary Chocolate Cake.....

I guess any place that came after Delhi was going to seem like a total walk in the park after what we had experienced.  I don't blame Delhi, well, maybe I do a little, but the truth is that I think we were probably just a little unlucky. However, Delhi is only a tiny part of India so we should be careful not to assume that the whole of the country smells of petrol, cow shit, rabid dogs and out of date chicken and that the constant sound of rickshaw horns and persistent shop owners is the norm.  That would be unfair.

Classic Indian train digs.

When we eventually left Delhi, which was naturally difficult, we started to settle down a little and enjoy ourselves.  Our first stop away from Delhi was Agra.  Actually that's not strictly true.  On the way to Agra we jumped off at what we thought was our stop (as was confirmed by numerous locals who it seems do not actually understand how to say no....another good lesson learned) and were peddled around on a rickshaw for an hour and a half before our driver realized we were 50km west of where our hotel was actually located.  A 50km peddle rickshaw is too much for even the most hardened drivers so we jumped on the train again and finally made it.  Thank God!

The most amazing thing we saw by far.

Agra was a quieter , quainter version of Delhi and more importantly it was easy to breath the reasonably clean air.  Apparently there are strict rules enforced on pollution to protect the facade of The Taj Mahal.  I'm not sure if anything in India is "enforced" to any degree, but the air did seem cleaner so you never know.  We spent a couple of days checking out the Taj Mahal and Agra Fort.  Both were amazing.  The Taj Mahal is probably now my favorite building.  My only issue with it was the sheer amount of Chinese and Japanese (and possibly some other kinds of those types) blocking the view of everything.  They were literally everywhere.  They all have the biggest most expensive cameras too which is weird because they take shit photos.  A couple asked me to take a photo of them so I stood in position with the Taj behind them, not a bad shot I thought to myself but they didn't seem pleased.  Oh no.  They wanted a shot of them standing next to a tree.  It wasn't even that nice of a tree.  Shit photo.  THE FUCKING TAJ MAHAL IS RIGHT BEHIND YOU!  Anyhow, we had a great time there and it was nice to learn about the history of the buildings and what not.  I won't bore you with the details, that's what wikipedia is for.

Hanging out on the Ganges the night before Laura took ill.

So now we are in Varanasi which is by far the best place we have visited so far.  It's a very cultured place with a very interesting history and offers many chances to immerse yourself in the Indian culture.  We've dabbled in yoga, which has lead to us dabbling in massages due to being in absolute agony afterwards.  We also took a boat out on the Ganges to watch some bodies being cremated on the waters edge.  I know that sounds like the total rapeage of a very personal and upsetting ceremony but that's kind of just the way it is.  Aside from the boat loads of tourists whizzing past, the ceremonies are very spiritual and its nice to see that the families and friends of the deceased have so much respect for those being cremated.

Today, I was supposed to have a sitar lesson.  Supposed to.  Laura managed (managed sounds like she has been trying for ages....she has not.) to fall ill again.  Poor little bugger.  She's in a bad way.  Today is actually our anniversary which we decided we would celebrate yesterday as there were more options of things to do.  Let me tell you how it went;

Laura got ill.  Now just to clarify when someone gets "ill" in India it means they are shitting through the eye of a needle.  Lets not go into the real specifics though.  When she finally got to sleep, I snuck out to go and buy her some presents.  Romantic, I know.  When I got back she was awake so she started unwrapping said presents.  Half way through unwrapping them, the poor lass had a little accident in her undercrackers.  The kind of accident that would be bad timing whatever you were doing, but to be half way through a romantic gift giving session was the best use of slapstick comedic timing ever.  She didn't think it too funny mind.  Being the hero that I am, I got her cleaned up and even cleaned the boston from her soiled shreddies.  If that's not love I don't know what is.  Travelling makes you closer; FACT.

It might seem a little bad taste to be writing such things about my ill girlfriend (who has actually been verbally promoted to wife to reduce confusion amongst the locals) but when you're travelling, talking about bowel movements with strangers is as common and harmless as talking about the weather at the bus stop in England.

Lessons learnt this week;

1. Indian's don't know how to say no. 
2. Never ask yes or no questions.  See above for the answer that will be received.
3. Always ask leading questions.  For example,"Which station is this?" as opposed to "Is this Agra station?".
4. Every other traveler in India has been ill and scammed.  It's not personal.
5. India is a really cool place.  It just takes some getting used to.

You might notice there are no photos with this post.  Somehow, they have been deleted from our memory card.  Totally gutted, all our photos of the Taj Mahal are gone.  Nothing is ever easy eh?

As soon as Laura is well again we'll be heading over to Jaipur.  Hopefully that won't be too long.

x